


Precious

by lori_yuy



Category: Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII (Video Game 1997), Final Fantasy VII Remake (Video Game 2020)
Genre: Babysitting, Comedy, Crack, Fluff and Crack, Lab Accidents, M/M, Working With A Child
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:42:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28353375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lori_yuy/pseuds/lori_yuy
Summary: An accident within Hojo's lab turned Tseng into a kid for a day and Rufus found himself having to babysit his head Turk.
Relationships: Rufus Shinra/Tseng
Comments: 4
Kudos: 35





	Precious

Heidegger was rambling on and on while the representative from the other company listened while hacking away notes on a laptop. This was an important business partner for Shinra and Rufus sat diligently and actually listened to everything Heidegger had to say despite wanting to pull his hair out from the grating voice. He had gotten up early to attend this meeting and it's now nearly noon and he couldn't have been the only one in the room starving. A catered lunch was to be served soon and he let out a small sigh when the secretary came knocking to announce lunch break. His stomach held out long enough not to make embarrassing noises in the middle of the meeting. He kept his manners throughout lunch while engaging in business small talk with the stalky middle-aged representative.

As they were discussing details of potential future business deals, his PHS buzzed against the table. He quickly apologized for the interruption. Whomever was calling him right now better have an actual emergency, but nonetheless, there could only be a handful of individuals who would call him on this phone so he better take the call. He pressed the phone against his ear without as so much as giving a greeting. A certain redhead's panicked voice flowed through the speakers. 

"Mr. President we've got a problem!" Reno's "problems" were usually annoyances but where was Tseng? Isn't Tseng the first line of defense against Reno's "problems"?

"This better be a real emergency."

"It is!! I swear!! You gotta come down and see for yourself!" The urgency did not subside from Reno's voice and Rufus pulled away the phone from his ear to gaze at it. The number was from the Director's desk's phone. He put the phone back at his ear while sending another apologetic look towards the customer representative. "Reno, can this wait?" There was probably only another hour or two of meetings left with the customer after lunch and if whatever emergency they had down at the Turks' HQ can hold off till then....

"It COULD techni....GET OFF OF THERE! Rude, help me find something to cover him up! This isn't funny Elena!"

He could hear the soft giggles of the female Turk in the background. This definitely didn't sound like an emergency. He pressed the button to hang up the call. To his annoyance, his phone buzzed again and again during the rest of the customer meeting and he willfully ignored it when the number popping up was again from the phone on Tseng's desk. If Reno thought this was a funny prank, he's going to get scolded ten fold after this, and Rufus will be sure to involve Tseng since Tseng seemed to be one of the few who could dampen the redhead's brash personality. Where was the Director anyways? His phone never stopped buzzing. Even as he was walking the representative out the front door of Shinra Tower, the phone kept vibrating in his pocket. Heidegger gave him a leering side eye as he saw that it was the Turks' Director that had been calling, with the call log showing over a dozen missed calls.

"Tseng better have some damned bad news for you to have called you that many times when he knows you're with a customer all day." Heidegger started. Rufus hated that Heidegger may be right for once. He made a face before stepping into the nearest elevator and pressed for B3.

  
~...~

  
The sight that greeted him was more than he had mentally prepared for. Reno was knocked out on the floor with small angry red footprints on his bare chest. Rude sat quietly at his desk while Elena was on the sofa cuddling a child wrapped in a large white shirt. And Tseng is... His eyes drifted quickly back to the child in Elena's arms.

............... 

He stared in silence for what seemed like forever before the kid looked up, spotted him, and flew off the sofa towards him. He barely had time to process as the kid clung to his leg like an octopus. He just then noticed the Director's jacket and the rest of his clothes and weapons piled and folded neatly on the large desk. His eyebrows knit together as he mentally worked out what was happening. The child hugging his leg is undoubtedly Tseng with the tilak in the middle of his forehead - and he was damned cute.

"Accident in Hojo's lab." Rude explained without him asking. "He'll be like that all day according to one of the lab technicians."

"I sorry." The kid mumbled to him. He put a hand on the dark headed kid, raking fingers through the bangs falling into the boy's eyes. "What for?"

"I got accidented." Whatever this version of Tseng is, his pronunciation and grammar had degraded to match his age but he seemed to be at least partially aware of what was happening and was apologizing for causing Rufus trouble. Rufus felt like his heart was about to burst. How could he even get mad at this? He told Rude and Elena to keep an eye on Tseng for the rest of the day because he had a couple of briefings scheduled still, but the boy wouldn't let go of his leg.

He glanced down at the child with an exasperated look. "Tseng, are you going to let me go do my work?"

"No. I go with you Mr. Present." .... Mr. Present?

Rufus suddenly remembered there was a box of old clothes somewhere in one of the closets in his flat, sentimental pieces he kept locked away as memories of his mother. "Come with me then." He noticed that the kid's feet were bare when he stepped forward and the floors of the Shinra building were made from cold tile. "Or...." He reached down and picked Tseng up, making sure the shirt covered all of his bottom as Tseng clamped small arms around his neck. 

He got more stares than he'd have liked walking down the halls of Shinra Tower. He's going to make the Turks do information damage control later. What are the employees going to say about the President of the company walking around carrying a child dressed in an adult's shirt? He luckily made it to his flat without too many more pairs of eyes on them. He placed Tseng on the oversized bed and began to dig through the closets. The first box he found had rocket themed pajamas and bunny slippers. Really? He doesn't even remember having bunny slippers as a kid. He put that box aside and dug for more. 

"Mr. Present, I made a mess." Rufus slowly turned around to see a puddle and a trail of .... lube from the bottle on their bedside table spilled on the floor and Tseng's hands were covered in the slippery liquid. LUCKILY his flat had no carpet. He grabbed the nearest roll of paper towels and wiped Tseng's hands clean and then had the rest soaking up the liquid on the floor before either of them could slip and fall on the stuff. 

"Remind me not to let you out of my sight." Rufus mumbled as he picked up the child and started rummaging through the closet with one hand while holding Tseng with his other. He held up several pieces of clothes he pulled out from various boxes against Tseng to measure for size. The child had other ideas however. His eyes landed on a fluffy white cape blanket - Moogle themed.

"You want that?" Tseng nodded and was too happy when the the cape-blanket was draped over him with a hoodie with the little Moogle ears and the red antenna sticking out over his head. Rufus laughed before he finally found a set of clothes that seemed to work for Tseng's age. A pair of gray dress pants with a semi-formal checker print sweater. Tseng in his kid outfit - the thought was laughably cute. He unbuttoned the large white shirt and blushed when he realized that was all that was covering the child. He quickly slipped the only kid sized underwear he could find, Cactaur print boxers, onto Tseng and proceeded with the gargantuan task of getting him into the child-sized sweater and pants. Tseng's hair was now flying up wildly from the static electricity that had built up from both the sweater and the Moogle hoodie over his head.

"Unfortunately the only shoes I found are these slippers so you'll just have to look ridiculous for today." Rufus said as he put the bunny slippers onto little feet then buttoned up the Moogle cape. He quickly snapped a memorial photo with his phone.

His phone buzzed then, an alarm for his upcoming meetings. A five minute warning. "I hungry." He threw the child over his shoulder as he headed towards the elevators and as he exited towards the executive suite, he grabbed a handful of candy from the secretary's desk. "I hungry Mr. Present." His secretary looked up alarmed as he proceeded to stuff a large lollipop into Tseng's mouth, effectively shutting the child up for the foreseeable near future. "Could you please order a kid's meal to be delivered up here?" He asked the secretary as he walked away with the child still dangling from his shoulder. The secretary stared after his retreating form in pure confusion as the Moogle antenna waved from the movement on the child's head. Is it just her or did the kid look familiar? Order some food, order kid meals. She decided it wasn't her place to ask and called the cafeteria instead.

  
~...~

  
Heidegger always came to the briefings prepared, but prepared to him meant prepared to give a long speech. He was pretty irritated from the meeting earlier today when he found out the head Turk had been calling Rufus nonstop. The damned man was way over his head just because he and the President are the same age and probably plotted the demise of Rufus's father together. He gnashed his teeth in frustration, readying himself to be further humiliated once again with the Turk smirking at him over Rufus's shoulder as he gives his briefing. He begrudgingly walked up to the Presidential desk and paused with a double take when it was just Rufus sitting by himself.

"Mr. President..."

"You're late."

"Sir, I had a few issues down in my department I was dealing with. If you're ready, we can proceed with the briefing." It was kind of strange not seeing Rufus being graced by the presence of the long haired Turk even though it annoys the hell out of him.

A squeal sounded from under the executive desk as a bunny slipper struck out from underneath. Rufus frowned and pulled until there was a child sitting in his lap. "Get out of there, it's dusty." Rufus chided as he patted dust bunnies off of the child's clothes and hair. 

Heidegger's eyebrows shot so high up that it was comical paired with the dumb look on his face. If his eyes weren't tricking him, his mind must be. Isn't that Rufus's outfit from over two decades ago? He now recognized the Moogle cape as well. It was something Mrs. Shinra had gotten for Rufus when they went to a theme park in his youth. Rufus used to parade around in President Shinra's office in that ridiculous looking cape. He was definitely gritting his teeth now as he recognized the tilak in the middle of the child's forehead. Fucking hell NO. He is NOT sitting on the President's seat with Rufus Shinra - in Rufus Shinra's lap - no matter what the circumstances are. This is totally unacceptable. Heidegger could no longer keep the irritation off his face and he scowled at the child menacingly.

"Don't look so glum, do you not know how to act in front of children?" Rufus said nonchalantly as he held back a smirk at Heidegger's irritation, purposely cuddling little Tseng closer.

During the entirety of the briefing, Rufus could see Heidegger's eyes veering off and straying towards Tseng nestled against him in a protective hold. The tension in the air was almost palpable as the general broke lines and lines of reports to him in his gruff voice. The secretary came in quietly at some point and placed a platter on the table. Chicken nuggets and mac and cheese. Tseng wordlessly stuffed the leftover lollipop into Rufus's mouth before attempting to grab a chicken nugget with his bare hands. Rufus pulled him back quickly to wiped his hands with sanitizer before letting him eat. Rufus didn't pay him any attention as he focused on his meeting. Heidegger was dragging things out as usual and it was Scarlet's briefing time now. She swaggered into the office with a load of files in her hand and quickly shot Heidegger a glance when she noticed the kid sitting with Rufus wolfing down junk food. Scarlet stood off to the side watching the kid intently. Cute child though...but wait. Oh.... That would be why Heidegger was looking so upset. She passed another glance at the way Rufus held kid Tseng as he scooped spoonfuls of macaroni and cheese into his mouth. 

He was being poked in the arm. "Yes precious?" He is going to just call Tseng that the rest of the day because this will probably be one of the few times in his life that he can.

"What are these?" Tseng squeaked as Heidegger droned on. 

"Macaroni." 

Tseng held a spoonful of it up to Rufus's mouth, who just barely managed to crunch through the rest of the lollipop from earlier. "Try it! It's good!" Rufus hid a smile behind his hand before being fed a spoonful of the cheesy food. Scarlet watched with an amused expression as Heidegger seethed beneath his breath. A dollop of yellow goo flew across the table splattering onto Heidegger's nose and he absolutely lost it when he realized what just hit his face. "YOU LITTLE TWERP!!!" He yelled at kid Tseng while baring his teeth.

"You looked mean at Mr. Present!!" The child fought back. The plastic spoon was still vibrating from how he used it as a launcher earlier. Tseng was already a sharp shooter even at that age.

Rufus put up a hand in the air to stop the non-sensical bickering from going further. "Now now Heidegger, remember he's a kid who doesn't know any better." 

"What happened to him anyways?" Scarlet chimed up. 

"Well...let's just say Hojo was involved. I'm watching him for the day." Rufus sat back and patted the boy on the head, Moogle ears, antenna and all. "But let this be a warning that if you ever deal with Hojo, be prepared for anything to happen."

"Why are YOU taking care of him Sir?" Heidegger asked, curiosity getting the better of him. "Are you just going to babysit any time Hojo turns someone into a kid?"

"If you ever got turned into a child, I'd have Scarlet babysit you." 

Scarlet sent a glare at Heidegger that said _don't you dare put that burden on me_. Heidegger scowled before excusing himself. It was as good a time as any to make his leave with pasta still dripping off his face. He sent a final glare at the kid beaming at him from the Presidential seat before storming off to the nearest bathroom to clean up.

  
Scarlet's briefing was more technical than anything and Tseng was soon bored. He slid off Rufus's lap and started wandering around the executive suite. Rufus didn't care. The room was mostly empty space and the door to the top of Shinra Tower was locked so there was a slim chance that he'd wander out to the roof. His secretary was outside the main doors so he was also not worried about Tseng wandering into the rest of the building. Still he kept an occasional eye out for the child in between minutes of briefing, following the red antenna on the Moogle cape as a signal that Tseng was still nearby. When he next looked around for Tseng his eyes settled behind Scarlet and widened in alarm. "Scarlet!"

She let out an uncharacteristic screech as she felt the back of her dress lifted and something furry squish in between her legs. The glare she sent down there could have killed others but did not faze the child. He laughed loudly and rolled away as she tried to kick him for peeking under her dress. "It's pink and has polka-dots!" Tseng cried out as Scarlet's face turned the shade of her name. Rufus face-palmed and apologized to the female Director before getting up and pulling Tseng back in his lap. "We don't do that to ladies okay?" He chided as he bopped the boy's nose in reprimand. The incident seemed to speed up the rest of Scarlet's briefing and she ran out of the Executive Suite faster than Rufus has ever seen her move. He's going to make Tseng do a formal apology after things go back to normal.

  
Palmer's face just turned into an O face when he saw the child. Lucky for him there wasn't much to report from his department and he just bursted out in hideous giggles as he walked out of the Executive Suite.

  
Reeve's eyes popped when he saw a miniature Tseng in Rufus's seat. It was already late afternoon and Tseng was tired and had fallen asleep clutching Rufus's jacket. Reeve decided it was best not to ask as he gave his briefing, then glanced at the child again when he was finished. 

"Would you like me to find him some toys?" Reeve offered. 

"No it's alright. He'll be normal again soon enough." Rufus replied, holding the sleeping child against his chest. "Though, could you help me call up the Turks' HQ. I'm kind of stuck with him sleeping like this."

  
The rest of the Turks came up to the suite with dinner as Tseng started waking up from his nap. The sunset was pouring in through the windows of the suite, lighting the place up in gold and orange hues. There were three pairs of raised eyebrows when they saw what Rufus dressed Tseng in. Rufus shushed them explaining that he couldn't find much else and Tseng insisted on the Moogle cape. 

They sat around his large executive desk and ate dinner then and there. Tseng poked at his smaller portion of food. "What is this?"

"Spaghetti, precious." Rufus answered as he ate his own food. 

"S-spetti." He repeated in a mimick. "SpaGHEtti." "SuGEtti." _Whatever you want to call it Tseng._

Tseng struggled with the pasta slipping off the fork. Rufus stopped to show him how to eat pasta with his fork and soon he was devouring it gleefully. "SuGEtti is good Mr. Present!" He declared. 

The three other Turks stared in awe at the little monster with tomato sauce spattered around his mouth. Adult Tseng HATED spaghetti with a passion - so who is this and what the heck happened to Tseng? They were all expecting the kid to flat-out reject the pasta when they started eating, but they got their fair share of surprise. Also, Mr. Present? Elena was drowning in cuteness and Reno and Rude just managed a smile.

Reno helped carry all of Tseng's stuff from Turks' HQ up to the President's room before they retired for the night with each Turk asking if Rufus needed help watching kid Tseng but they were met with refusal.

  
~...~

  
"A TRAIN!!" Came another excited shout in his ear as a night time train passed through Sector 0's station in the distance. This was the umpteenth time he's tried to get Tseng to sleep, and his late afternoon nap and Midgar's exciting night view was not helping at the moment. The never-ending lights below Shinra Tower was a constant spark of interest for the little boy. Does he need to tie him down in bed or something? 

As they approached midnight, he suddenly noticed that Tseng had gotten a little taller and his hair became a little longer. The clothes on him were being stretched out. Was he slowly returning to normal? Rufus decided it was safer to get him out of the child-sized clothes. Most of it was easy, but Tseng still stubbornly wouldn't let go of the Moogle cape. Rufus threw up his hands in the air. "Fine, you can keep that, but when you get back to normal you're not going to like it." He covered the child with a blanket and clamped an arm firmly over Tseng's stomach so he couldn't randomly jump up again to look at Midgar's traffic.

Early morning light poured into his eyes as he laid under a warm pile of blankets, Rufus's snores rumbled next to him. He was stark naked, minus a warm thing over his head. He pushed himself off the pillow to see a fluffy Moogle ... blanket? on the pillow. What the heck? He pulled it off the pillow and glanced at the strands of his hair stuck to the fluffy white material. Rufus stirred next to him and smiled when he realized Tseng was awake and back to normal. 

"Thanks for yesterday."

"Sir?" He actually doesn't remember much of anything from yesterday. What did he do? What even happened yesterday? When did he join Rufus in bed?

"You reminded me of why I wasn't planning on having kids. Though I'm grateful that someone had you."

????? Tseng made a noise of confusion. "What happened?"

Rufus chuckled and threw the blanket back over him. "I'll tell you later. Go back to sleep, it's still early."

In the back of his mind, he was secretly wondering what the other Directors would be thinking when Tseng is back as his right hand later today.

**Author's Note:**

> I just want to hug little Tseng all day. I am imagining him to be around 4 or 5 years old in this.
> 
> I will shamelessly blame Hojo's lab for all kinds of situations in my crack fics XD.


End file.
